A recent survey given to married women stated 64% said they would leave their husband's TODAY if they were financially sound, but most of them are not able and thus, they stay in their unhappy marriages. 64%, that's a pretty high percentage if you ask me. That means almost 1 in 3 of your friends so the next time your sitting around think about that!
Where is the love? This kind of goes back to my question that I asked in my "the one" entry. Can you name 5 couples that are truly happy that you'd bet your house on? Relationships are complex and marriage is something that requires effort from both parties. Women and men think so differently.
Dr. Helen Fisher of Rugers University, a noted anthropologist, who is also the author of such books as Why We Love has dedicated her career to understanding love. She responded to the following questions:
Q: In a nutshell, why do we fall in love?
Dr. Fisher: I’ve come to think that romantic love is one of three basic brain systems that evolved for reproduction. Each evolved for a reason: The sex drive evolved to get you out there looking for partners. Romantic love evolved to enable you to focus your energy on just one person at a time, conserving time and energy. And attachment, the feeling of security you can feel with a long-term partner, evolved to help you stay together long enough to raise kids.
Q: Can someone truly love more than one person?
Dr. Fisher: No. I think you can feel lust for more than one person, and feelings of attachment for more than one person. But not love. As the Indian aphorism goes, “The lane of love is narrow; there is room for only one.”
Q: What’s the biggest mistake people make when it comes to love?
Dr. Fisher: Some people fall in love before they really know their partner and marry in this state of romantic rapture. They should probably wait until that intense early phase wears off so they can see the flaws in the relationship before they dive in for good.
Q: What do men look for in a mate?
Dr. Fisher: Men are more likely to choose women who display signs of youth and beauty—the first time that they marry, men around the world tend to marry women who are three years younger than themselves. Men are also attracted to women who “need” them. Men want to be helpful.
Q: What do women look for in a mate?
Dr. Fisher: Women are attracted to partners with money, status, and ambition—one study found that American women seek partners who offered financial security twice as frequently as men do. If men look for “sex objects,” then women look for “success objects.”
Good information!
1 comment:
Chemical Romance
Okay, Maybe I was wrong. I can admit that. Maybe I just had to adjust my thinking on love to allow for a "One" possibility.
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